Rembrances of 9/11

Every year this comes up.  Oddly, I have a place on my web page to discuss it, even though most of what I remember was going numb.

I was working at an insurance company when the first plane hit the WTC.  Then a friend in NY called in a panic and I went into crisis mode, giving her advice and suggestions on how to get out.  When she tried to figure what to do I kept up on the news, which was easy – insurance company after all.  I couldn’t avoid it.

The week was a kind of blur.  News on all the time.  Work.  Playing “Elder Scrolls: Arena” just to sort of do something.  Chatting online.  As I noted, numb, numb after the searing realization.

Eventually the numbness faded.

I remember seeing Americans get unified (despite some horrible incidents).  I remember heroism in the rubble.  I even recall how IT people saved companies with good backup strategies – standing out as I was a programmer at the time.  It’s in pieces and flashes.

It’s little images falling through my mind like snow, light between the blackness.  I try to remember that because we need that feeling, that knowledge.  We don’t need the numbness.

Now, there’s talk about the meaning of 9/11, the impact of 9/11, it’s all politics and abstract theories, all propaganda and opportunism.  The meaning seems to have been leached out of it considering the later political excesses and the wars so easily ignored now.  It’s not the big picture we talk about anymore, it’s a little picture inflated to look big.

Our media and so often our memories have gone numb, and considering or dysfunctional news media and punditry, numb and dumb.  There’s no feeling there, and it’s not even the earned numbness of facing the pain.

So now, I look back, look at the numbness, and try to remember the light and the painful lessons and the heroism and the chaos.

– Steven Savage

Steven Savage is a Geek 2.0 writer, speaker, blogger, and job coach.  He blogs on careers at, nerd and geek culture at, and does a site of creative tools at He can be reached at