Because We Need These Moments

Recently, a friend of mine lost their job – a job they weren’t fond of anyway, but it was still a loss. I was concerned about them – but then this person reflected how, that very day, their work in the community made them feel better.  My friend always liked to help people and this moment, this single moment, reminded them of what they did and why.

My friend remembered what was important.

We’ve probably all had moments like these – in our civic work, on our hobbies, in times of being silly. No matter what we need these moments of “yes, this is right.”

These moments of “this is great” aren’t just a quick high (or shouldn’t be); they’re those vital times that remind us that life is worth living, that we like what we like, that things can be great. We need these moments not just to keep us sane, but to remember what we can do, what we like, what we care about.

One of the reasons I preach the idea of fan-to-pro (in the rational sense, not the blue-sky sense) is that your fannish activities tell you what matters. Oh sure you may not what to mention what you were doing at the time when you found something that mattered, but it’s important. Those little moments give you an idea of what makes you who you are.

When we can string enough of those moments together, we can find a way to build a life out of them.

It migh not be something other people like. I’ll be honest here, part of the reason I’m a Project/Program manager is that I’m an incessant problem solver. I have to fix things, both by concern, by a sense of order, and by a love of a challenge. I denied I’d be a manager many times – and here I am.

But find what matters to you. Go do those crazy things, stupid things, silly things, personal things, deep things, unremarkable things – that you care about. It’ll tell you what matters, and maybe get you onto a better path in life.

If you pay enough attention to these great things, those moments of depression and darkness and doubt are kept at bay or evaporate.  They’re just not as permanent as you may think.

  • Steven

Find People Who Fill In Your Professional Gaps

So the old saying goes that no man is an island. I would note that very technically someone standing in water is an isolated body in water, and thus technically an island, but then I’m just being a jerk.

But the truth is we’re not complete. Human beings are naturally inclined to work with each other (even if we’re not doing so by benevolence), which makes sense. There’s a lot we can’t do on our own.

In fact there’s huge blanks in our lives as there are simply thinks we’re not capable of. I can pretty much guarantee that you don’t write your own software, cook your own food, repair your own car, build your own house, and remove your own appendix. Buckaroo Banzai and TOny Stark, those Omnicompetent heroes of fiction are just that – the Renaissance man is an ideal to aspire to at best.

If you’re any kind of professional or a creative with professional aspiration, you want to find people who fill in your blanks.

Awareness By The Book

I’ve always been a pretty independent guy, but for me my work on writing made me painfully aware of jut how much I can’t do on my own. I’m not a great technical editor (at best I’m average), I can’t do cover art, and I can’t create a multibillion dollar distribution company with a self-publishing branch. Hell, even pre-reading gets hard as after awhile I’m tired of my own damn book.

My own career? I’m a Project and Program Manager. I provide things other people can’t do (organization) but in turn I am vastly ignorant about the many areas I touch and have to rely on people. I am spread thinner than a specialist, and so I have to have others around.

Sure I coached others, filling in their gaps.  But really I also have to fill in my own.

You should be too.

The Gaps You Face

You address an issue by being aware of it. So here’s the places I’ve found myself and others may need someone to fill in our blanks career-wise.

Resumes – Look, everyone should know how to make a good resume. Maybe you can, but if you can’t find someone who can.

Economics – Yeah, I always advise people to be aware of the economy. But sometimes being aware is knowing “I should ask Dave what the hell happened.” If you know your grasp of economics isn’t the best, then find someone who can advise you.

Organization – We should all be organized enough to keep our lives in order, but some of us are not long-term planners. Be it a roommate who keeps the budget or admitting your Project Manager should tell you what to do, sometimes you need organizational skills – on the job or off.

Relations – On the job you might not exactly be Mr. or Mrs. sociable. That’s ok – some jobs require intense focus to get done. So if you’re not the most sociable of people, let your boss/co-workers/etc. know so hey can help out. Some teams even work well with a designated “face” – get the gregarious person to get out there and do the work of being likable.

Social Media – Ugh, I’ve seen some people make some sad social media mistakes (most notably, public pictures of them with a beer bong during a job search). If you’re engaged on social media, it might not hurt to ask one of your savvy friends for tips on how that may affect your career.

Investment – I am a strong believer in managing your own investments. In fact my usual take is “Index and/or retirement fund and that’s it). But if you can find someone you trust to advise you, its worth it if you’re not up for that thing. It may take time to find someone reliable (and I’m prone to only trust “investment professionals” after careful evaluation), but its worth it.

Career Steps – We almost all have to “outsource” getting career ideas from people more senior to us as they have the experience. Learn to ask for help, observe those where you want to be, and learn. Trust me, I never expected to be where I am now – but it worked. I probably could have listened earlier.

It’s OK

So look, it’s OK to admit on the job, on the job search, you can’t do everything. I firmly believe you should do as much as you can, but you won’t be able to do it all.

But also be aware – you can fill in someone else’s gaps. There’s things you’ve got. There’s things you’re good at. Maybe you can even set up a trade.

Hell, good co-workers and good friends fill in each others gaps instinctively. you might know more – and need more – than you realize . . .

– Steve

Update – Sailor Moon Book!

Well here’s the latest update on the Sailor Moon Book . . . the research phase is done!

. . . this is not exciting as it sounds.  First, because we’re not doing an in-depth historical book so it’s pretty basic.  Secondly, most information on Sailor Moon is limited, biased, or piecemeal.  The best sources for discussing the experience were Sailor Moon Reflections and Warriors of Legend – both of which ironically focused on aspects of Sailor Moon different from our focus.  Go figure.

The biggest surprise so far seems to be the ill-explored history of Magical Girls.  Everyone traces it back to Sally the Witch, but Sailor Moon seems closer to Princess Comet (the manga, not the 2000’s anime based on it), but there’s really little on that series.  Probably worth revisiting.

Meanwhile Bonnie finished editing the entire book, and integrated new interviews, so now I’m taking this week to do an editing run.  As the book itself is roughly 120-140 pages that’ll go pretty quick.  In fact, I’m rather glad it’s not voluminous – it’s got a friendly, intimate feel.  It’s like a documentary or series of con panels s a book, and we’ve kept a bit of an informal feel inside the formal organization.

Once I do that pass it’s time for her and I to sit down and read it together – then it goes to prereaders and contributors.

Still not dropping until September or so – sorry folks, we want this done right.  But if we can accelerate it . . .

  • Steve