Psychology

Fun And Yourself

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(This column is posted at www.StevenSavage.com and Steve’s Tumblr.  Find out more at my newsletter.)

We’re in a crisis as I write this. We’ve got a worldwide Pandemic, and not every country is managing it very well (or at all). It’s possible you’re escaping with fun, but you may also feel guilty, or unable to enjoy yourself, worrying you’re wasting time.

You’re not.

Yes, fun is relaxing, yes, fun distracts. But fun also is a great way to get back to who you are and find out who you are.

When we have fun, we express parts of ourselves in safe ways. Perhaps we love the camaraderie of sports, and thus enjoy them because of shared identity. Maybe we love managing things and ticking boxes, playing strategy games and using that organized sides of ourselves. We may crave adventure, our hands holding a controller as we fire our guns in an action-adventure game. Fun lets us get back to who we are.

Knowing who we are is vital for navigating crises. It centers us, but in a safe way, and gives us the hope to become more of who we are. It’s an expression, and a reminder.

But also, fun lets you find new parts of ourselves. When we see we’ve played the same kind of video game three times in a row, that says something about us. When we avoid this kind of movie but indulge in others, that says something about us. When we have fun, things we don’t know of emerge.

Knowing who we can be is vital for navigating crises. It helps us grow and learn and understand, and experience the joy of being.

Finally, fun lets us find things we hide. We may find a dark side that comes out in our musical tastes. We may discover we work through issues with certain kinds of movies. Even finding we dodge stress with our recreations tells us what we’re dodging.

Knowing who we are lets us overcome our problems, turn vices into virtues, and accept ourselves. Fun does that.

So sure, you’re relaxing and exscaping with fun. That’s great. But you’re also becoming, exploring, and discovering. That’s great to.

Have fun. Become yourself.

Steven Savage

Schedules, Order, and The Zone

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(This column is posted at www.StevenSavage.com and Steve’s Tumblr.  Find out more at my newsletter.)

With the coronavirus lockdown, it was challenging to keep up with my writing, especially my novel “A School Of Many Futures.” My life had been disrupted, my girlfriend’s life had been disrupted, my co-workers were dealing with changes, and there was the omnipresent specter of death. Not the best time to feel creative.

But I wanted to write, despite not having much of the right mood. There was something there that wanted to, writing is part of me, and I didn’t want to give up.

So here’s what I did – and something I found that surprised me.

What I started doing was scheduling writing time and/or goals. Each day more or less I tried to write, my Worldbook having a goal of writing 2 questions a day, and for my novel usually an hour on it (or an hour replotting). I admit for a stretch of weeks I was at best meeting 80% of my goals, but it was better than zero, and I was still writing.

It was a slog for awhile. You can kind of guess the reasons for it as you’re probably experiencing them or have experienced them. Still, work got done, and it was pretty good work.

Then I noticed something. I was getting more ideas, especially for my novel. I began noticing techniques that fired my imagination. I was getting inspired despite the slog, following the schedule . . .

. . . except I wasn’t. I was inspired because of the schedule.

I realized in time that because of the coronavirus crisis I’d lost touch with my inspirations. If I had just written because I was “in the mood” I’d never have written. But following a schedule meant I was always in touch with my writing even if I didn’t want to be or care.

And in time, that awareness led to inspiration and ideas and being viscerally aware of my work. Instead of writing when in the mood, the schedule kept me writing and let me more easily find the writing mood where inspiration flowed.

If you’re having trouble being creative in something, try this. Don’t wait for the mood, just make plans and do your best. Keep at it, but don’t beat yourself up if it’s not perfect. See what happens when you spend time on it.

It worked for me in time, but first you have to put in the work.

Steven Savage

The Haunt

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(This column is posted at www.StevenSavage.com and Steve’s Tumblr.  Find out more at my newsletter.)

“I feel like I’m haunting my own life,” is how I described my creative state of mind while sheltering in place during the COVID-19 pandemic.

I’m here, but I’m not quite me. I’m less than I was, but still going. I’m engaged, but not fully there. Sounds horrible, doesn’t it, but also understandable.

We’re locked down, limiting our movement and activities. We’re trying to restructure our lives to work within new constraints. There’s a pandemic rushing around the world. Most government responses leave something to be desired, to be kind.

We’re tired, disoriented, afraid, and unsure of the future. No wonder we feel bad. No wonder I feel bad, like a ghost in my own experience.

But you know what? I’ll take it.

At least, like a ghost, I’m still here and still going. I haven’t given up and am holding on by sheer will.

At least I’m still in my own life, even if I feel insubstantial. I’m still here, if currently an echo of myself.

At least it’s an approximation of me and my creativity.

And if nothing else, like a wandering spirit, I might just find a way back.

So know what? I’m going to take this sensation, this echo of my usual creativity. At least there’s enough me to have this sensation to feel. I may not be at 100%, but at least I’m at some percent.

Besides like a ghost I can find a way back.

Not quite feeling yourself? Of course you don’t feel like yourself, we’re in a terrible situation. As long as you feel enough like yourself to keep going, you’ll find a way forward.

It’s OK to feel a little ghostly.

Steven Savage